beer helps you study right?
This is cute.
About three years ago, I was under the very misguided impression that going to a gym was an unnatural and superficial means to looking better at the beach. I ran challenging outdoor courses and believed I was much healthier and more fit for it. I had no interest in gyms, because I was a little too cool for that.
Playing rugby inspired me to be stronger. I wanted to be more powerful and solid. I wanted to bring down the biggest, fattest packs and drag skinny wings along on my ankles as I charged to the try line. So I thought about the gym, as a maybe thing.
I didn’t know how to go about getting from point A- gym virgin, to point B- gym regular. I thought I’d be judged for my lack of knowledge. The equipment in a gym intimidated me. I didn’t know how to work out… reps, sets, weight… What was my goal? I wanted to be strong. But I didn’t want to be big and bulky like a football player. Or did I? Did I want to “tone”? No… that’s what girls do and I’ll make active choices not to be like other girls. So I want to “build”? I guess. Can I lose weight while doing that? It’s all about working out right, and diet is a separate thing?
The first time I tried a gym on a guest pass, and after figuring out the locker room (I really knew nothing), I jumped on the treadmill. Because I knew how to run. It was my first time on a treadmill, and I was watching a Steelers game on the TV. I misstepped off the belt, fell to my knees and grabbed the handles to keep from flying off. I skinned a fat layer off both knees and bled like a bitch. Needless to say I got back on and acted cool, though I was embarrassed as fuck and never went back to that gym.
I have a big dark scar on each kneecap to remind me of that.
Soon after that I went as a guest to a gym with my sister’s Marine boyfriend Scott. He showed me some basic free weight workouts, the reps/sets thing (we decided I was going for the football player look), and I ran on a treadmill without eating shit. It was a good day.
I remembered those exercises and took them to the school gym. I learned some more from friends there. I looked things up. My workouts became more frequent. As my experience increased, I began to give more to others than take. I realized the gym (can be) a community. It can also be a haven.
Today, working out is possibly my greatest passion. I do it frequently and depend partially on the endorphins it provides. I lift heavier than most girls and many guys. My body isn’t just my vessel of living now, it’s a growing machine.. my greatest weapon and tool. I dress and undress in front of the mirror because I look better out of clothes than in them, and there isn’t a thing about my body I’m not proud of. It’s my secret that I hide in my shirts and pants… that wherever I go, if I need to be strong I can be strong. My body is like a blade that I carried dull for years, and now I keep it sharp and ready.
Sorry that paragraph is cornier than cornballs rolled in corn syrup and dipped in corn puffs served over a bed of corn.
This summer, because I’m home for just a few months, I’m going as a guest with Scott daily, sometimes twice daily, to LA Fitness (which I hate but that’s that). We are teaching each other. He showed me new arm workouts. I kicked his ass for an hour with abs. It’s a lot of fun, and I’ve come a long way since we last worked out together.
This has been a post.
Today I am 30% straight, 28% gay, and 42% not even giving fucks.
I feel like a solitary grizzly bear: alone, wanting for fishes, and covered in dirty fur.
beautiful female bodies
beautiful, feminine bodies
lovely contours and lovely irregularities
smooth skin and long hair and the scent of flowers sometimes
soft and loving from birth to death, inside and out
aesthetic and essential
beautiful natural females
beautiful female bodies
This is a baby moose and I want to pet its ears and raise it into adulthood and then perhaps ride it into the sunset.